stephen R Harrison

Drink water from your own cistern, running water from your own well. -Proverbs 5:15

A Proverbs 5 man knows God created sex for procreation and pleasure to be inside the boundaries of marriage for one man and one woman for a lifetime. Anything outside of God’s design for sex is sin, and a godly man realizes that sexual sin will destroy and disappoint. God isn’t trying to deprive sexual enjoyment by establishing boundaries. He is protecting and enhancing the blessings and enjoyment sex can bring to the marriage relationship. After all, He created everything, including sex, and knows best for us. He desires that “Marriage should be honored by all, and the marriage bed kept pure, for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral” (Hebrews 13:4). Sex comes after and only in biblical marriage.  That’s why Adam and Eve were united in Genesis 2:24 and weren’t naked and unashamed until verse 25! My wife and I have enjoyed a 100% faithful marriage for 23 years and even remained sexually pure while we dated throughout high school and college. We were taught the Biblical boundaries and blessings of marriage, purity, and fidelity early on. While that doesn’t mean life has been without temptation and struggle, God can help anyone overcome temptation from lust and all sexual sin (1 Corinthians 10:13). 

In Proverbs 5, Solomon warns the reader to avoid “the adulterous woman”. While this may be a specific person you need to avoid because they are tempting you towards lust and sexual sin, Solomon was personifying lust to drive home his point. He cautioned to get God’s wisdom, insight, knowledge, and discretion (1-2) to avoid the seductive, alluring deception of lust, as it will bring destruction and leave you empty. Sexual sin will rob you in more significant ways than you think! In the moment of temptation, we are deceived into thinking sexual sin will never harm us. In reality, it hurts everyone around us. Solomon said sexual sin robs our honor and dignity (9). The Bible names several sexual sins. Jesus used the word pornea in Matthew 19:9 to mean all sexual immorality and encompass those sins the Bible forbids, such as adultery (Exodus 20:14; Luke 16:18), homosexuality (1 Corinthians 6:9-10; 1 Timothy 1:9-10), and fornication (1 Corinthians 5:1; 1 Thessalonians 4:3-4). These may seem acceptable and even promoted by current culture, but God’s ways are higher, and He commands purity from those who follow Him (1 Corinthians 6:18-20). 

Our character, integrity, reputation, trust, and good name are tarnished by sexual sin (Proverbs 5:8-9). Solomon also said our wealth is stolen (10). How many times have I seen a man (and woman) driven by lust foolishly (and often secretly as they desire to keep evil deeds in the dark) spend money on gratifying sexual sins (pornography, prostitution, adultery, etc.) and even worse end up losing their business, marriage, and having success and possessions taken away! Solomon said, “Lest strangers feast on your wealth, and your toil enrich the house of another.” He warned how sexual sin would leave one empty and in a lifetime of regret (11-14). As Paul said, it is better to “flee sexual sin” (1 Corinthians 6:18) than burn everything down in lust (1 Corinthians 7:9).

Solomon instructed his readers and us today to “drink water from our own cistern” (15).  Men, be faithful to your spouse, and if you are not married, remain sexually pure until marriage. While God can forgive sexual sin, it’s not without its consequences. With every sin, we reap what we sow (Galatians 6:7-9). The “running water from your own well” in verse 15 indicated purity in a monogamous marriage. Verses 17-19 prove you can be fulfilled for a lifetime with your spouse. Stop flirting with that person who is not your spouse. Reserve flirting, intimate conversations, and all sexuality for your spouse. Stop believing the lie that “the grass is greener on the other side”.  That’s usually because it is built over a septic tank! You can be faithful and satisfied with your spouse for a lifetime! Purity begins with wisdom (1), is sustained by discipline (23), and results in satisfaction, blessing, and true love (18-19).

Questions to Ponder

1. In what ways does lust tempt you?
2. What boundaries do you have in place to overcome lust?
3. What verse stands out the most to you?
4. What other questions came to mind?